Slap cheek, eh?

I picked Goomba up from daycare on Monday and I noticed that her face seemed a little rosy. I didn't really think much of it and put it off as a little sun/wind exposure from playing outside. On Tuesday, however, I walked into the Toddler room at school only to be greeted by an 18 month old Bozo the Clown. It probably didn't help that I had dressed her in a fuchsia shirt that day but nonetheless, my child had suddenly morphed into a little Pikachu. Large, red, round circles adorned her adorable little face as she happily ripped a small truck from a playmates hand. The first words out of my mouth were "Oh my god, what is wrong with her face?" I didn't really direct the question at anyone in particular since it was more like a gut reaction but one of the teachers immediately responded with "It's not just her!" Either she was trying to make me feel better or she was trying to stop me from going nutso in the middle of the Toddler class. Regardless, this new red-faced trend the toddlers were sporting didn't seem to impede on their socializing or stop them from continuing to slobber all over each other.

After consulting Dr. Google, Wikipedia, WebMD and BabyCenter, I came to the conclusion that Goomba had Slap Cheek Disease. What is Slap Cheek Disease you ask? Well let me tell you. It is a common childhood virus that passes without much concern and very mild symptoms, except for the Pikachu cheeks. Let me just say that it should be illegal for someone to categorize a mild virus as a "disease". A name like "Slap Cheek Disease" is just asking for mothers to turn into anxiety crazed lunatics.  I confirmed my diagnosis with Goomba's pediatrician whom assured me she would be just fine and she would not have to live out the rest of her life as a Pokemon character.  The Slap Cheek has now passed and we (our whole house) have now come down with a new bug. Boogers, sore throats and coughs, oh my.

Statistics say that children in a daycare setting can get on average 8-12 colds per year. I knew this little factoid when we enrolled Goomba in daycare. What I failed to realize is that those 8-12 colds would be concentrated mostly during the fall/winter months during Flu season and that the 8-12 estimate would be on the low side for our little over-achiever. So let's break that down. The Flu season can range from 4-5 months long. 12 colds divided between 5 months of the flu season means that our booger filled children will have just under 2.5 colds each month for 5 straight months. Think about that a littler further.  If each cold lasts 7-10 days from onset to finish (some are longer) and they get 2.5 colds per month that means that you can count on them being sick 17-25 days out of each month for the entire flu season. 17-25 days of boogers, coughing, vomit, diarrhea, red faces, non-sleeping, cranky little children running through your house infecting the rest of the family for 5 straight months. Add on top of that the worst flu season that we have seen in years and I promise you that by the time spring hits you will be ready to pawn off your little cesspool to the nearest grandparent so that you and hubby can escape to some tropical paradise as far away as possible.